Ah, alimony. The magic word that makes every married man Rowdy Rathore. Everyone thinks alimony means men have to give money to women when they get divorced, like a penalty for getting married. Well, it’s 2025 and it’s time to rid yourself of these unnecessary kaleshes, beta ji. There are easy ways to avoid being trapped by alimony and child support, you know. You don’t have to give all your “hard-earned” money to your wife if she leaves you. Here’s how to escape alimony in 2025.

Stop marrying for money

In other words, stop selling yourself to the highest bidder. Stop expecting dowry or “gifts” from your wife’s parents just because you’re their damaad. Don’t think that they will give you a car, furniture for your house, expensive appliances, and cash, and then just let it all go when the marriage goes down the gutter. If you don’t marry for money, she won’t divorce for money.

Take time to know the person you’re marrying

People can change, of course. But a perfectly sweet, sudhra hua insaan doesn’t become a criminal overnight. That’s why the safe thing to do is to take time to know your spouse-to-be. 80s ki Bollywood picture toh chal nahi rahi hai. The sweet girl you’ve chosen won’t become a vamp as soon as the sindoor hits the spot.

Don’t be in a hurry to procreate

Sabke vansh aage badhaane laayak nahi hote hain, but that’s a discussion for another day. You want a child? Fine. Marry someone who also wants a child around the same time in life that you do. If you want to marry just to procreate, might I suggest changing your thinking a little bit to avoid conflict, divorce, and subsequent child support payments? If you have a child, you can’t escape paying for the child’s life, whether you’re married or divorced. So, don’t be in such a hurry to badhaao your vansh, and make an informed decision.

Understand that marriage is a partnership

If you really want to escape the alimony trap in 2025, behave like you’re living in 2025, bachche. Don’t force your wife to quit her job because mummy-daddy said so. Everyone deserves to have a career and do what they would like to do with their lives (excluding criminal activities). If she is capable of making a living for herself, trust me, the court will not force you to pay alimony.

Stop listening to every Chintu Mintu Pintu giving you “advice”

Everyone is a relationship counsellor these days. But they really shouldn’t be. Because if the advice that you are getting is that “Bhabhi ji loot ke le jayegi sab kuchh”, step back and ask yourself why you’re letting people talk about your wife like that. If these are your true friends, one of them will give some constructive advice as well. Like, go to a professional marriage counsellor instead of listening to the mohalle ka chhapri.

Also, in case this didn’t get through earlier, one of the best ways to avoid alimony is to not be a crappy husband. Try it, bachche. It’s not that difficult.

GIFs Source

Related: 3 Major Signs Of A Husband Who Doesn’t Love His Wife Anymore