If this was written a couple of months ago, it would undoubtedly be for the millennials and the Gen-Z kids. However, now since almost everybody is home with close to zero social engagements, this topic becomes relevant for almost all of us. Conversation starters in a public setting are often as easy as a passing smile or just a look that makes you say ‘hi!’ to the person in front of you. In a digital sphere, it gets a tad bit difficult because there is no physical interaction for any possible gestures like smiles and simple looks. So, how do you start a digital conversation with someone over DMs and texts?
Before we get into the tips and tricks, here are some things you need to know –
- These tricks aren’t specifically for dating but they can be used for dating apps too.
- These tricks aren’t meant for any specific gender, they are for anyone who is interested in starting a conversation with someone new.
- If someone does not respond to your DM, don’t keep at it – this isn’t a Bollywood film where poori qaayanat will help you. Move on.
- Do not send unsolicited personal pictures of ANY KIND.
- Be kind, not a troll.
Now that we have that covered, let’s talk about conversation starters and tips to keep a chat active.
Memes are not conversation starters with someone new
If you’re looking to talk to someone for the first time, sending a meme as a DM is not a good idea. You’ll most likely be left on ‘read’ or be blocked if you come across as a creep. Memes are for people you know or those who have expressed interest in having a conversation with you.
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Don’t just say ‘hey’ for the sake of starting a conversation
Conversations are all about the flow of actual words and sentences! If you just send a ‘hey’ expecting the other person to take up the rest, please expect to be left on ‘read’.
What’s in a name?
A lot! Nameless texts and ‘guess who’ techniques are a big no when it comes to digital conversations. If you’re texting someone for the first time, especially when the other person might not have your number, always introduce yourself if you don’t want to be blocked.
Why are you even texting? Tell them!
One of the best icebreakers is simply starting with telling the person who you are, how they know you, and why you’re texting them. Your reason for texting them could be something as simple as ‘dropping a text to say hi and see what’s up with you.’
‘Ok,’ ‘hmm,’ ‘k,’ and one-word responses are invitations to be left on ‘read’
These responses are the easiest way to make someone lose interest in you. They are often the end of a conversation if you don’t follow them up with another message. Because honestly, think about it! What would someone say as a response to ‘k’?
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Video or voice notes are not conversation starters
Do you know them well enough to send them a video message or a voice note? If your answer is no, then why are you even sending one? And if there’s really something that needs you to send a video/voice message, just ask if they’re okay with it. Most people don’t say no.
Ask questions, but try not to get personal
The trick to keeping a digital conversation going is to engage with the person on the other side of the screen. Asking questions keeps the conversation alive with back-and-forth responses. However, asking personal questions about family and love life may not be a good idea, especially if you’re talking to someone new.
If you’re thinking about starting a rant, don’t.
If you’re talking to someone new, ranting about something without a break is not only boring but is also a major cringe-alert. New conversations are meant to be interesting and engaging and not about listening to the other person vent. Save your rants for your close friends.
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Successfully starting a digital conversation with someone new is only half the battle won. The other half is keeping their interest alive in talking to you.