Hello, bachche. It’s your good old Aunty Eve again, here to give you the gyaan you need to survive in this big, bad world. And this week, I’m going to tell you how to celebrate Father’s Day, use it to your advantage, and earn major brownie points at home. So, follow my advice and be a good bachcha.

Don’t ask your dad for money this weekend

Don’t even ask your mom. Till Monday that is. Then you can resume your regular chhichhori habits.

Let him burp in peace

There will come a day when you will burp loudly and uncontrollably and you will wonder how that happened to you. But, by then, you would’ve earned the right to let your gas escape without shame. Your father is at that stage in life too. Stop denying the man his outlet.

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Indulge your dad by agreeing to see a rishta

Refuse on Monday, it’s not Father’s Day every day. But at least he’ll have a happy Sunday.

Let him fight with the neighbour about car parking

Sometimes, the only thing a person needs is a good fight. You’ll see. Let him have it out with the neighbour and then see his cheeks glow a healthy pink for the rest of the week. You can even use that good mood to ask for a few concessions for yourself, beta. But don’t overdo it or the next explosion will be on you.

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Give him all the household bills to tally his budget

You know nothing gives him more happiness than calculating the kharcha and bachat of the month. Just make sure you don’t include your credit card bill or the bill for that grotesque lamp you insisted on buying because “blacklight is cool, Papa”.

Let your dad have the TV remote all day

Even if he’s watching the 100^th rerun of the most boring Test match in history, let him do it. Don’t demand the TV remote as if your human rights are being snatched away.

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Order the food he likes

And pretend it was made at home. This way, he doesn’t need to suffer your cooking on Father’s Day and he won’t lie awake at night thinking of all the investments he could have made with the ₹1,500 you spent on food delivery.

Stay in your room but not for too long

This means stay out of his way but always let him know where you are without disturbing him at the wrong time. It’s complicated, I know. But figure it out for one day, bachche. This man tolerates you every other day of the year.

Have a good weekend, beta ji, and follow these tips on how to celebrate Father’s Day without fail.

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