Let’s admit it, we’ve all been in a room where an uncle cracked a wife joke thinking it was harmless and hilarious. The conversation usually ends with a common conclusion — women are complex creatures, always leaving men guessing. As a man, have you felt it, too? Have you ever thought about the gravity of this situation? Women are not as difficult or emotional as you think they are. They won’t give you the silent treatment or cry at the drop of a hat if you care to understand them well.

To get to the bottom of this confusing situation, I talked to a few to know what they feel when they use certain terms. So, whether you’re a clueless boyfriend, a seasoned husband or just someone curious about what women say, these responses might help you. Scroll through to understand what a woman means when she uses these common phrases.

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1. “I feel like I’m talking too much”

Have you heard a woman say this to you? Do you know what she means by this? Anushka* said, “I know I’m not talking incessantly, but I still think about this. I feel I’m not giving much space to the other person to speak. Moreover, I constantly overthink if I’m making them feel uncomfortable through this.”

Guys, if she’s genuinely not blabbering, you can show interest by contributing more to the conversation. This way, she won’t feel like the only person speaking for hours.

2. “I’m not mad, it’s fine”

This is the most common phrase women use in daily conversations. When I asked Payal* what she meant by this phrase, she replied, “I am upset about certain situations. But I’m also tired of bringing it up time and again as the other person doesn’t realise the problem on their own. Moreover, I fear it will turn into another argument or worse, they’ll dismiss my feelings.” Men, this should be your cue to listen and address the issue the next time you hear this phrase.

3. “I don’t know if I’m making any sense”

Ankita* is guilty of using this phrase, but she can’t help it either. She said, “I don’t know why I tend to say this while talking to men. I feel they would disregard my opinions or say I’m overthinking.”

Women hesitate to share their thoughts as they question whether what they say is valid. The least you can do is acknowledge her opinions.

4. “I just think it’s funny how…”

Do you get the dripping sarcasm here? By saying this, women like Jasmine* mean, “I unintentionally use this during a heated argument with a guy to at least keep my point. Because whenever I use a serious tone, it either angers them or they call me dramatic.” Take notes, men. You must create a safe space for women to communicate their feelings.

5. “I don’t care, you decide”

By saying this, Riya* meant, “I do care, but I’m tired of making all the decisions alone. Majorly, the men I interacted with never took charge of even the smallest tasks. Every time, I had to plan out dates and decide the menu. Sometimes, I had to book the cabs too because they wouldn’t even think of it. This has been the case with my male friends as well.” Seriously, guys? It’s time you do your part and share responsibilities equally.

6. “I don’t need anything, thanks”

Or maybe they do? Guys, do you know why women use this common phrase whenever you ask them if they need anything? Malvika* said, “When I say this, what I mean is that I’d love to be spoiled a little. But I don’t want to come out as a needy person. Moreover, I don’t want to burden anyone by asking for something.”

Women wouldn’t be overthinking to this extent if you got things right in the first go. Just pamper that girl without making her feel inferior. She deserves some love.

7. “It’s really not a big deal”

But sometimes, it is. “Some situations are a concern for me when they repeatedly hurt me. But if I speak up, people will think I’m just nagging. And so, I choose to downplay the whole thing by not sharing what I exactly feel”, Asha* said.

Men, the next time you take this statement at face value, just don’t. Rather, understand its underlying frustration. Moreover, listen to the woman instead of passing it off as an irrational argument.

8. “I’ll do it myself, no issues”

This is a classic response women usually give when someone wants to help them. But do you wonder why? When I asked Arushi*, she said, “I’m never aggressive when I say this. I low-key want people to help me. But if I take help, I’ll be tagged as a dependent woman. Other times, I have seen men doing things their way whenever I accepted their help. They didn’t even try to understand how I wanted them to assist me. Situations like these have made me deny any help they offer.” Her example proves that taking the initiative to help isn’t enough. It’s about knowing how to do so.

*Names changed to protect identity.

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