The end of a relationship feels a lot like death. The loss can feel overwhelming especially if you’re ending a marriage, which means you’re putting an end to a life that you have created with someone you once loved. Or at least cared about. While it’s important to take care of your mental health at such a time, it is also vital that you are absolutely sure of your decision. If you want to leave your spouse, here are a few things to consider before divorce.

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Do you know a good lawyer?

Or do you know people who can put you in touch with a good, reliable lawyer? Before you file for divorce, you must get detailed legal advice to know each step of the divorce process. If you don’t know of any lawyers, do your research, get in touch with a few on your own, and hire one based on your circumstances.

How are your finances?

Before filing for divorce, ensure you have enough in the bank for at least 3-6 months of expenses. Divorce is an expensive affair, so you must be certain that you can pay the legal fee without taking on crushing debt. The money you have earmarked for these expenses should not be in a joint account with your spouse.

How will you make this easier on your children?

If you have children, it is your and your spouse’s responsibility to make your divorce as smooth as possible for them. The mental, emotional, and physical impact of divorce on a child can be immense, so it would be ideal to identify a good therapist for your children. They will likely resent you and your soon-to-be ex-spouse for this massive change and block you out, but they may open up to a neutral third person.

Where will you live?

You will need a solid plan in place before you move out. And if you have children, you must also think of their needs when looking for a place to live. Alternatively, if you are not the one moving out, where will your partner live? If you have children, you should ensure your partner’s new living arrangements are convenient for everyone involved.

Are you prepared to be alone?

This is one of the most important factors in a divorce. Are you truly prepared to go through life alone? Relatives may support you and friends may promise all kinds of help, but you can’t rely on them to be there for you all the time. You have to know everything there is to know about running your life. Do you know who to call if the fridge stops working? Do you have health insurance? What about your car insurance? These are just a few examples of things that may sound minor but can be overwhelming for a person to handle alone.

There’s no reason to let this scare you into staying in a bad marriage. But we hope this will help you make a smooth transition to the life you want to live.

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