Fresh out of a breakup? Is someone else already giving you butterflies? It’s exciting, but are you sure that’s love? If you are newly single, chances are you are still not over your ex. In such a scenario, if you start a new relationship, that’s a rebound relationship. You shouldn’t be treating your partner like a band-aid to get over your ex, nor should you be treated like that. So, if you suspect you are one half of a rebound pair, here are some signs to look out for.
1. The breakup was very recent
If you are dating someone who is just a week out of their relationship, you are a rebound. Even if your partner’s old relationship ended a couple of months or so ago, and they were not expecting the end, chances are this is a rebound relationship. If someone has been in a serious relationship, they will need time to mourn the demise of that relationship. And it’s healthy to spend some time alone after a relationship ends to get over the last relationship as well as take stock of what they are feeling. But, if you have a partner who has jumped into a relationship with you fresh off a breakup, that’s a bad sign.
2. They constantly talk about their ex or not at all
Telling each other about your past relationships is quite natural when starting a new relationship. However, if your partner is giving you a play-by-play of what their ex liked and didn’t like on a daily basis, it might be time to run for the hills. An unhealthy obsession with an ex is a sure sign they are still not over the past relationship. Similarly, if your partner refuses to speak about their ex at all, that’s not a good sign either. That is another sign of unresolved feelings and it doesn’t bode well for your relationship.
3. The relationship seems rushed
In a rebound relationship, there are high chances that you get the feeling of being rushed. Your partner seems to be saying “I love you” too soon, they may be talking about you being the “love of their life” in a very short time. They may even be love bombing you, showering you with gifts and affection, so much so that you feel uncomfortable. A rebound relationship is bound to make you feel overwhelmed and rushed. So, be on the lookout for such signs.
4. They want to show off your relationship
Flaunting your relationship on social media, or in their friend group, hoping for their ex to come across it, is a likely agenda when it comes to rebound relationships. You no longer feel like a partner, but rather a prop to be shown off. Running into exes is common, especially if your partner and their ex share a common social circle. But, if every action your partner takes is targeted to catch the attention of their ex, that’s a sure shot sign you are a rebound.
5. They run hot and cold
Do you feel your partner is really affectionate and loving one moment, and the very next, they are irritated, bitter and maybe even go completely silent? This could potentially be because they still aren’t over their ex. Running hot and cold is a common sign of a rebound relationship. This could be due to a lack of emotional attachment to you.
6. There is no sign of any long-term commitment
If you feel your partner is running from any conversation that deals with future plans, it’s time to take a step back and take a good look at your relationship. If your partner avoids talking about a long-term commitment, especially if they haven’t communicated, or they want something casual, it might just be best to let go of the relationship altogether.
7. Your relationship is centred around sex rather than emotional intimacy
Sex is an important aspect of any romantic relationship, but it shouldn’t be the sole focus. If the passion in your relationship is just limited to the bedroom without actually learning about each other, that’s not a sign of a healthy relationship. If you are just going through the various stages of a relationship without actually building intimacy, there really is no point in the relationship.
8. You feel used
If you ever feel like you are just a means to an end for your partner, that’s another sign you are in a rebound relationship. If your partner prematurely flaunts you on social media but refuses to introduce you to their family or friends, that’s not a good sign. Similarly, if they are willing to get down and dirty with you, but refuse to spend time taking you out to dinner or indulge in some hobbies, chances are high you are in a rebound relationship.
9. Your partner is always bitter
Despite being in a relationship, if your partner is always bitter, that’s not just a sign of a rebound relationship, but also a toxic one. Their bitterness comes out when talking about their ex, and sometimes that is projected onto you. If your partner is constantly critical of their ex, or the whole gender itself, or if they are constantly dissatisfied, that’s not a sign in your favour.
There’s nothing wrong with a rebound relationship. But only as far as both parties are aware it is a rebound and just a means to an end. A rebound relationship becomes problematic the moment one partner is left in the dark and they are trying to single-handedly make the relationship work. So, be aware of the signs that make it clear you’re in a rebound relationship.
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