Yes, beta ji. I am an expert dating coach, the best one in south Delhi. Aapko pata nahi chala abhi tak toh that is your lack of basic observation skills. Not my fault. Anyway, I am here to fix one of the biggest problems in your life. Because you, my dear, have no idea how to impress a girl. Especially in 2025, when girls are going to be smarter than ever (I hope). So, here is how to impress a girl in 2025 because your 2024 ki chalaakiyan are not going to work anymore.

Less talk, more action

Don’t shout from the rooftops about how much you believe in gender equality. Instead, show it in your actions. Girls are very much impressed when you tell other boys to stop making senseless jokes about women. They are not at all impressed when you join the creep gang and say things like, “Why are girls so sensitive ya? Can never understand the mind of a woman”. Girls are not mysterious swamp creatures jinka dimaag ulta chalta hai. Talk to them normally and treat them like fellow human beings. Just don’t keep applauding yourself for being a basic level of decent.

Work on yourself

If you want to learn how to impress a girl just to make her your therapist/cleaner/cook/family counsellor, you work on yourself first please, bachche. If you think you need fixing, hire someone to fix you, like a therapist. Girls are impressed by boys who don’t need any work and are happy individuals. Girls are not impressed by boys who are emotional messes and can’t be bothered to work on themselves. Apna khayaal nahi rakhoge, toh kisi aur ka kya hi khayaal rakhoge, beta ji?

Look after your mummy

Have you seen how overworked your mummy is? She looks after everyone in the house as a default setting and doesn’t even ask your papa or you to share in the daily chores. Learn how to cook and start cooking meals at home at least once or twice a week. After that, learn how to wash your own chaddis because it’s ridiculous that a grown adult’s mummy has to touch his dirty underwear. When girls see that you’ve stopped being a man-child and are a responsible, proper adult, they will be impressed. Because the bar is actually that low, beta ji.

Talk to her, not at her

This is the best foreplay tip you will ever get, bachche. When you talk to a girl, like actually listening and conversing with her, she will want to meet you again. But when you try to “act like a man” and talk over her or ignore her when she’s talking, you will be alone forever. Unless, of course, mummy and daddy step in and phasao a gullible girl for you. It’s very simple. Just do what you wish your father would do when your mom complains about him to you.

Keep your wallet inside

Baat baat pe paise phenkne ki zaroorat nahi hai. Girls are not impressed by money, they like to see intent. And good intentions don’t cost anything. If she wants to split the bill, just do it instead of thinking it’s a hit on your mardaangi. You don’t have to buy her any gifts to make a good impression. She will be happier with a pauper who respects and loves her instead of a rich man who thinks narcissism is a flex.

I hope you have learnt how to impress a girl in 2025 now. If you still haven’t, I think you should do the world a favour and stay single.

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