Do you have gay or trans friends? Maybe you watch gay movies, or you’ve got a whole lot of Pride paraphernalia on your work desk. Do you think all of it makes you an ally? Sorry to burst your bubble, love, but that doesn’t make you an ally for the LGBTQIA+ community.  It takes a lot more than being friendly with the people of the community or reading gay fiction. If you want to be a true ally to the queer community, here are a few things you can do.

Related: How To Respond When Someone Comes Out To You: Madam Eve Shares Her Infinite Wisdom

Educate yourself

There’s more to the community than just the seven words LQBTQIA. So, it is important to know them so you know how someone identifies themselves. It’s not cool to misgender or misidentify a person, so educate yourselves about the varied identities in the queer community. Make it a point to learn about the struggles faced by the community, be respectful when you ask your friends questions, and most importantly, be open and willing to learn.

Related: 13 Terms Under The LGBTQIA+ Banner That Go Beyond ‘Homosexual’ And ‘Bisexual’

Use the right language

The language we are taught is predominantly cis-het and binary in nature. But the reality is different.  Using inclusive language like folx instead of folks, womxn instead of woman, and using the correct pronouns are some of the things you can do make the LGBTQIA+ community feel accepted and be a good ally to the queer community.

Check your privilege

Most people are privileged, whether it is by virtue of class, race, socio-economic status, education or something else. Being cis-het is also a privilege because you don’t face the challenges that the LGBTQIA+ community faces. That’s not to say cis-het people haven’t had their fair share of challenges. It just means that they haven’t had to think twice about certain things or worry about how people will perceive them based on their sexual preferences or gender.

Stop your assumptions

Don’t automatically assume all your friends, colleagues, or acquaintances are straight. Don’t assume their gender or pronouns. Instead, politely and respectfully ask them what pronouns they prefer to be called by. Also, honey, the queer community is not a stereotype that Bollywood loves to make them out to be. So, stop with your assumptions.

Check your phobias

No, I am not talking about hydrophobia, arachnophobia, claustrophobia, etc. I am talking about queerphobia. It is very real and often, unconscious. It could be the way you address someone, the gay jokes you make thinking it’s not offensive, or even the stereotypes you prescribe to. Being an ally to the queer community means challenging those biases and your internalised queerphobia.