Let’s be honest: we all know we shouldn’t be getting our self-worth from social media. But we still obsessively check how many people liked that reel we spent six hours editing. Validation? We know it’s a trap. Do we still fall for it? Absolutely. Hard. And that’s exactly what Bani G. Anand and actor Babil Khan dove into in a recent episode of AfterHours with All About Eve. So, where does Babil Khan find his validation? Is he glued to the dopamine hits of digital applause like the rest of us, or has he cracked the code to feel secure without the algorithm’s approval?

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“It’s a survival instinct”

We’ve all been there – the rush of checking our notifications after posting a picture, hoping for a flood of likes or encouraging comments. Bani asked, “Where do you derive validation from? Is it from social media? Or is it from the people around you?” Babil was refreshingly candid when he replied, “It used to be…I mean, it still is to a great extent.”

But here’s where it gets interesting: while many of us were learning the perfect selfie angle by age 13, he was still living in the offline world. “When I was 16, I didn’t have social media. But I needed my friends to accept me,” he said. “It’s the same thing, you just want to fit in, conform, just know that you’re safe.” And that’s the kicker, isn’t it? Whether it’s your school friend group or your Instagram followers, validation isn’t just a vanity thing, it’s wired into us. Babil calls it what it is: “a survival instinct almost to feel validated.”

“I didn’t have a smartphone until I was 21”

When speaking about social media validation and what it does to people, Babil said, “We turn people into statistics…It’s strange. If one person poured their heart out to you, it wouldn’t matter because it’s one person. But if 50,000 people liked your post, you’d care more about that because it’s a number.”

As the conversation went deeper, Babil Khan reflected on why he’s a little more self-aware about the whole validation trap and a lot of it, he said, comes down to how he was raised. “I wasn’t introduced to a smartphone till I was 21” he said. That’s practically unheard of in an age where 10-year-olds are creating reels and teenagers have public profiles. He explained that it was a conscious effort of his parents to keep him away from social media. “I hit the jackpot with my parents,” Babil said.

At the end of the day, Babil is still figuring it out, just like the rest of us. Catch more of Babil Khan’s take on social media, art, and modern dating on AfterHours with All About Eve podcast. Watch the full episode here.

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