Are you back, baby girl?

Well, I am…with a review of the third movie in the craziest movie franchise ever made. I mean, how do the makers of 365 Days release two movies in less than a year? Did they shoot both together? That would make sense, you know. Keeping the actors in a flow and not letting them get distracted by the real world. Maybe they’ve been locked in a remote island and can’t leave till they finish 10 of these movies. Laura does look tired.

The “story” begins with an angry Massimo (nothing new) and a sad Laura (also not new). She’s recovering from the terribly messy climax (pun intended) of the last movie. But but but, if you thought this film is just like the first two 365 Days movies, you would be highly mistaken, my friend. The difference is apparent from the beginning. Here’s why it’s SO DIFFERENT.

Massimo REFUSES sex

In this movie, when Laura first tries to hump her husband, he REFUSES. Yes, that’s right. He literally pushes her away. I know, I was as shocked as you are right now. But don’t worry, that refusal doesn’t last long. They’re doing it a couple of minutes after Massimo says, “No, the doctor says it’s too soon”. He has changed though. He’s moody in this movie. And fully clothed. Mostly. He also quotes a book. Major character development, bachche.

Macho Nacho is still around

He’s the man of Laura’s dreams. Literally. She sleeps, dreams of Nacho, wakes up, has sex or fights with her husband, goes out with Olga, and then sleeps again. And the cycle repeats itself. Nacho, on the other hand, is trying his best to be the real deal for Laura by speaking as intensely as Massimo.

Also, someone needs to tell these people that the country in which their movies are always superhits is chuckling at the female lead’s name.

365 Days has not lost touch with its musical roots

It’s highly commendable that this franchise is doing so much for the arts. They use a lot of music in their movies, even if the songs will be forgotten as soon as they end. Also, you’re not allowed to have your own thoughts about any scene in the movie. The 25,386 songs will tell you what to think about each sequence. You’re laughing at the sex? Hear the music. It’s telling you the sex is not intended to look satirical.

Laura finally gets a job

Someone finally listened to me and gave Laura a job. The career doesn’t really change her life though. Working has never looked this easy, children. Who wouldn’t love an office where you get to take your friend along and have your mom approve your work? Best career ever.

Make better choices, Laura

Kabhi Massimo, kabhi Nacho. Kabhi kidnapper, kabhi kidnapper ka jaani dushman. She doesn’t know what she wants anymore. She goes and tells her parents that she loves Nacho when she’s still married to Massimo. And when her mother tells her to figure it out, as a good mom does, Laura doesn’t really learn. She’s literally relying on her sex dreams to make a decision about her marriage. Even her dreams confuse her because isne apne lovers ko hi mila diya saath. Yes, there is a very confusing threesome in there for all 365 Days fans.

Yes, I didn’t give a “spoilers warning” before this review, but do you really care, baby girl?

Related: OMG, Bachche! Aunty Eve Reviews 365 Days: This Day…And She Has Things To Say