The Scorpio season is here to shake things up and make your mundane life a little less sad and a little more rad. So, stop finding excuses to skip the fun. Here’s your horoscope for November 6-12.

1. Aries (March 21–April 19)

I see you peeping out of your tower, Rapunzel, but your mother hasn’t kept you locked in. That’s all you. I don’t understand why you see leaving your bed and making new friends in the outside world as ‘too much effort’. If you can’t do the bare minimum, you’ve got to stop expecting God to wave a wand and give you a free upgrade magically. No one’s coming home to kiss you, you beauts, so step out and pick your own prince or frog, whatever floats your boat.

AAE Pro Tip: If you’re venturing out, don’t be a kanjar kid. Ask your mom if she needs any groceries.

2. Taurus (April 20–May 20)

The horoscope for November 6-12 is bringing your social and love life into the spotlight, Taurus. You finally have the chance to shoot your shot, so don’t be nervous and aim for what you want. Because this is a great time to hit Diwali parties and mingle a little. Throw in some casual flirting, because even if people don’t love your sense of humour, your desi fits will make up for it.

AAE Pro Tip: When you’re drinking, remember the difference between interesting anecdotes and TMI.

3. Gemini (May 21–June 20)

The Scorpio season is here to remind you to stop lurking in the shadows, step out, and be seen and heard. You aren’t someone who plays according to anyone’s rules. So, don’t let people puppeteer you, and don’t mask your true feelings and opinions. The stingy Scorpio energy is asking you to give hell to people who deserve it, and also show a little heaven to the ones you’ve ignored.

AAE Pro Tip: You’ll find immense support around you only if you’re ready to look for it.

4. Cancer (June 21–July 22)

Hello there, my dearest Crabs! Looks like someone is accepting themselves, both past and current. Well, the water season is the perfect time to take a little dip in the pool of forgiveness and let go, be it for you or others who might’ve wronged you. Holding grudges is not your best trait. Why be bitter when you can turn things around for the better?

AAE Pro Tip: Don’t do things for anyone but yourself. It is time to prioritise self-care and growth.

5. Leo (July 23–August 22)

How are you, my darling Leo? Don’t worry, this is not another life lesson or preachy horoscope reading for you. Instead, I thought of changing things around and letting you know that even you are allowed to have fun. Now, the definition of fun might vary from person to person but as long as you don’t get yourself or anyone else in trouble, all’s fair.

AAE Pro Tip: Miscommunication is a nasty little bitch, make sure you don’t get bitten.

6. Virgo (August 23–September 22)

It is the festive season and all the cleaning and dusting has got you really wound up. Nobody cares about that one little speck of dust in your crockery cupboard, so give it a break. The horoscope for November 6-12 advises you to take fun seriously this week. And if your definition of fun is taking a 30-minute nap by the clock, then so be it. It’s the season of lights, maybe you should lighten up a little and show people your lesser-seen fun side.

AAE Pro Tip: If you’re hosting people, switch to disposable cutlery and save yourself from hours of cleaning. 

7. Libra (September 23–October 22)

This is a good week to count your blessings and be thankful for everyone and everything around you. There are a lot of people who make your life a lot easier. And Scorpio season is all about cherishing this handful and realising how they put up with your stubborn and painful behaviour without really leaving you high and dry. So, skip the attitude and show some love, compassion, and gratitude, my love.

AAE Pro Tip: Showering people with expensive gifts is not the only way to show gratitude, but it’s a great start.

8. Scorpio (October 23–November 21)

Hello there, my beautiful, stingy birthday babies! How’s the birthday season treating you? I hope you are not getting passed on soan papdis and sagan ke lifafe with just 500 rupees in them. You deserve a lot more, and birthday season is here to remind you just that. Settling for the bare minimum has never been your personality. So, don’t settle for anything or anyone that’s not worth it. Now, get drunk because festive and birthday season is a valid reason to booze it up.

AAE Pro Tip: This feels like a good week to order things in your cart…and a huge pizza.

9. Sagittarius (November 22–December 21)

Looks like work is taking up most of your living and breathing minutes. So, how do you really shift the focus from your job and bring it to your personal life? I say, you delegate and give less fucks. Not everything is in your control, so use it to your advantage. After all, you deserve some solid fun too and I don’t see how constantly sitting in front of your laptop allows you to have any. Replace the laptop with some LIITs and make it lit this week!

AAE Pro Tip: Ignoring unnecessary people is a great way to avoid conflict.

10. Capricorn (December 22–January 19)

Like it or not, my darling Cap, every once in a while, hell does break loose and you have to confront your personal hell to sort matters. So, the horoscope for November 6-12 advises you to take it upon yourself to identify the cause for concern and eliminate it instead of going around in circles. If you’ve been thinking of doing something for a while, this is a good week to lay the groundwork. It might not be smooth like butter, but what’s life without a challenge or two?

AAE Pro Tip: Speaking of challenges, take it easy at work this week.

11. Aquarius (January 20–February 18)

Looks like someone is having some serious fun in the sun! But did you wear your sunscreen, my darling? Because if you didn’t, you don’t need your weekly horoscope to predict that nasty tan. The only nasty things that do look good on you are those passionate hickeys that you might wanna conceal before showing up for work. Do better, my darling, Scorpio season might give you free passes but you might run out of them if you don’t use them wisely.

AAE Pro Tip: If you’re seeing someone casually, make sure both parties are on the same page.

12. Pisces (February 19–March 20)

Hello there! It might be a busy season for many, but for you, it is time to indulge in some rest and reset. The first half of the week is going to be crazy, but the second half promises some time to nap and enjoy the finer things in life, like adrak wali chai. But plan your week beforehand so there are no last-minute market trips to get Diwali decorations.

AAE Pro Tip: The best things in life always come in pairs. Go ahead and make two cups of tea for yourself.

You’re an absolute phuljhadi. Don’t let anyone treat you like a fuski bomb, bb. Have a lit week.