Do you remember the most talked about Hot Priest from Fleabag? Phoebe Waller-Bridge is all of us when she asks, “You okay, Father?” To which the priest replies, “F**k you calling me Father like it doesn’t turn you on just to say it“. But a few days ago, I had a hilarious epiphany when Shraddha Kapoor was revelling in the success of Stree 2. Suddenly, she is now the topic of conversation among my male friends. They all want to marry her. So, is she the new Hot Priestess turning every guy’s head?

Shraddha Kapoor broke the internet when she dethroned desi girl Priyanka Chopra to become the second most followed Indian on Instagram with a whopping 92.5 million followers. It’s not the only reason she is making news though. Shraddha Kapoor’s latest release, Stree 2, has been raking in numbers and love alike. Simultaneously, she has become the ‘hot‘ topic for being a subtly sexy personality that every roadside Romeo wants to be with. But what makes her the subject of this male gaze?

In this era of Bollywood, where extraordinary personalities adorn the silver screen, celebrities like Shraddha Kapoor are a rarity. Even though people (*cough* men *cough*) would love to be surrounded by a hot mess, they go for women who can bring more than that to the table. Someone confident yet humble who wouldn’t mind ditching a bougie lifestyle for a quick street food stroll. This vada pav-eating Lamborghini woman is now every man’s ‘dream girl’.

Do you remember Veronica and Meera from Cocktail? The duo represented the sexy-sanskaari trope that every man wants. Veronica is every guy’s pick when they want to have a little fun and do some horizontal tango. But Meera, who was a seedhi-saadi girl Gautam had no interest in, suddenly becomes the love of his life the moment she switches from a salwar suit to a short dress. Out goes the hot girl Veronica, and in comes the seedhi but sexy Meera. Because the “perfect” woman is the mummy’s favourite, who promises you saath janmo ka saath with a drizzle of hotness.

How do women like Meera or Shraddha Kapoor fit in, or do they even need to? Moreover, why do people, especially men, prefer the women next door?

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Perfect ‘It Girl’

We know that a woman is considered “wife material” these days if she is both bratty and demure. But only to a certain degree. Men like to be with someone who can effortlessly switch from a ‘sexy’ personality to a sanskaari bahu in no time. It seems like the rulebook for an ideal woman isn’t going to die out soon. Women like Shraddha Kapoor might simply exist, and the next moment, we see men having a new ‘type’. Suddenly, they like women to pull off both sultry siren and sweetheart personalities. Do you see how I am representing the oh-so-stupid male gaze? Very thoughtful. Very appropriate. Do you see how men represent an ideal woman? Neither mindful. Barely demure.

Our mothers come from a history where they wasted their teenage years being sundar, susheel and sanskaari. Their prince charmings only married them because she was his mummy ki pasand. Now, times have changed or have they? (Not) Surprisingly, women must be sassy and hot so a man can easily flex her in his boy’s group. But to make it out of the group chat and into the wife category, she must be gharelu, sundar and susheel because that’s what her saas expects her to be. Men might be a walking red flag with a basic personality, but they’ll have a big wallpaper of Aishwarya in their room. Because they “deserve” her. Women like her and Shraddha Kapoor perfectly fit the male gaze. So, how can other women learn to be the “perfect woman” for a man?

Too glam to give a damn

You don’t! You just have to be yourself. Shraddha has become the epitome of a perfect woman that men aspire to be with. As women, we might settle for someone who checks two boxes out of five that we have. But men? Never. They want someone who is sexually attractive. But she should also be obedient enough because it’s ‘comforting and reliable’. Settling for just a single type is a tough (read: impossible) bargain for men. But women like Shraddha Kapoor and those on the other side still exist on the same plane. None of them need to mould themselves to be ‘likeable’ according to the trendy standards. Bestie, the next time you think you need to change yourself for a Pintu Chintu, please listen to Richa Chadha’s advice.

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Men would be flaunting their papa ka business with dreams of sitting next to Shraddha Kapoor in her self-earned Lamborghini. So hear me out. You are equally adorable in a suit and a bodycon dress. Society is a fickle bitch hellbent on turning you into a people pleaser. Today, thick thighs, which were “blah” in the past, are suddenly the hottest thing a woman can have. So now, men prefer girls like that. Tomorrow’s trend would be a short and slender girl, and men will consider that perfect. Conforming to the double standards would be a great loss for women. Men religiously alter their worship as and when it feels feasible to them. Today, it’s women like Shraddha Kapoor with the highest number of Instagram followers, and tomorrow, it will be another woman with another metric setting a new record. But these trends shouldn’t undermine the value of either woman. So, it’s better to be true to ourselves and exist in our little world according to our individual choices. 

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