Why is it that every time a woman thinks about doing some self-care, this tiny voice in her head starts whispering, ‘But what about your family?’ We’ve all been there – pushing aside plans, shelving dreams, and even cancelling trips because it felt “selfish” to prioritise ourselves and we feel guilty for doing so. Guilt is a normal state of being for most women. It’s a proven fact that women feel more guilt for everything than men do. 

Shefali Shah’s solo trip is an inspiration

 

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Society has done a good job of making women believe their joy comes second. But here’s the thing – it doesn’t. Women deserve to do things for themselves without the weight of guilt dragging them down. This sentiment was beautifully echoed by Shefali Shah, the powerhouse actor from Delhi Crime and Darlings. 

Recently, she shared a post on Instagram that struck a chord with so many of us. She was trying to plan a holiday with her family, but their schedules didn’t match, and eventually, no one except her wanted to go. So, what did Shefali do? Instead of scrapping the trip, she decided to go solo. 

Shefali penned, “…I decided to go alone. But a decision like this does not come without its moral dilemmas. Ranging from doubt (Should I go? Or shouldn’t I?), guilt (How can I go alone without my family?), to major guilt (How can I spend so much on myself?)” But she went anyway. And that is a bold and inspiring move.

Self-care isn’t a luxury for women

A study in the US revealed that 19% of single women and 86% of married women feel selfish about taking time for themselves. And I’m sure the statistics are the same, if not worse, here.

Think about it – how often do we let guilt stop us? We think, ‘What if they need me? What will people say? Is it selfish?’ But as Shefali’s story shows, sometimes, you’ve just got to put yourself first. And it’s not selfish, it’s necessary. Taking time for yourself doesn’t make you a bad mother, wife, daughter, or friend. It makes you human.  

Shefali’s solo trip is a reminder that the world won’t collapse if we step away for a bit. In fact, you’ll probably come back refreshed, happier, and more energised to tackle life.

So, let Shefali Shah inspire you with her words: “Before I give in to my Sati Savitri conscience, which believes any indulgence toward my solitary self is criminal, I do the bookings. I look deeply into the eyes of this guilt-ridden, ‘I don’t deserve anything’ woman and holler:

“Ja Simran, ja. Jee le apni zindagi.””

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