If there’s one thing you learn after years and years of attending shaadis, it’s how to spot an unhappy bride. In a perfect world, girls would just be able to say that they’re unhappy. But we don’t live in a perfect world. We live in a world where bachchas are told to smile through everything. So that’s what brides do. They smile till their jaws hurt even if they’re anxious and want to scream with rage. Kya faayda though?

A bride is generally unhappy for reasons more serious than the colour of her lehenga or the pimple on her chin. There’s definitely more happening beneath that frown that quickly turns into a smile when a camera or rishtedaar is around. Since she’s not going to come out with it, here are the signs of an unhappy bride that you should watch out for.

She doesn’t laugh freely on the “biggest day of her life”

Sab kehte hain a girl’s wedding is the happiest, biggest day of her life. But if that is true, why can’t she laugh freely? What is holding her back from showing actual joy on her face instead of a restrained smile? Has she been told to laugh less (only a yucky person gives such instructions)? Or does she have reason to be worried constantly?

She doesn’t speak unless spoken to

This is not a sign of politeness, bachche. This is one of the biggest signs of an unhappy bride. A happy girl is a chatty girl. She’s surrounded by her loved ones who are all focussing on her and making her feel like a queen – what’s not to be thrilled about? But if a bride is “sehmi hui” and being a “good girl”, she’s not a happy bride, trust me. She has been told to stay quiet so much that now, she doesn’t even have an opinion on her bridal outfit.

She flinches and smiles nervously if someone cracks a joke

An Indian wedding comes with so many shaadi jokes. And not all of them are cringe like shaadi = barbaadi or saali aadhi gharwali. Ew. Some are legit funny especially  from friends of the bride and groom during the pheras. But if the bride is just smiling nervously or looking at her husband for his reaction, she is a very unhappy bride entering a very unequal marriage.

She keeps asking about her in-laws

Instead of asking her cousins and friends to get her a drink or a plate of food, she only asks them about her in-laws. “Uski family theek hai? Mummy ji khush hain? Papa ji ke saath koi hai na? Unhone kuchh kaha toh nahi?” should not be a bride’s concerns. And if they are, it is coming out of experience. This bachcha has probably already endured enough taaney and demands that she now thinks a new problem will emerge every five minutes.

Her friends are kept away from her as much as possible

This is truly one of the most significant signs of an unhappy bride. Not only is she being told to smile through everything, she is going through so much that her family is worried her friends will figure it out. And that will be beizzati for them. Not the fact that their daughter is unhappy, no no. Bas kisi ko pata na chal jaaye that she is unhappy.

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