We love seeing adorable young contestants on reality TV shows, right? But when a 10-year-old Ishit Bhatt took the hot seat in front of Amitabh Bachchan on Kaun Banega Crorepati (KBC), his conduct left the audience divided and the host nearly shocked. The fifth-grader first asked Bachchan to not explain the rules and the game’s format, claiming he already knew them. Then, Ishit asked him to skip reading the options and impulsively answered all the questions until he eventually lost. The clips of Ishit Bhatt’s interaction with Bachchan went viral on the internet, prompting hateful comments. While some said he was merely overconfident, others called him rude. But the conversation also raised a broader question: why do some children behave this way in public? Is this indicative of bad parenting or something else?

We spoke to Dr Era Dutta, Consultant Neuropsychiatrist and the founder of Mind Wellness, to share her insights on why some kids are overconfident and what parents can do to guide them.

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Why some kids come off as ‘too much’

According to Dr Era, overconfidence occurs when someone is not mindful that their confidence is rubbing others the wrong way. In her view, this implies a lack of empathy, the ability to read the room, social skills, and the maturity to realise that you may be stepping on someone else’s boundaries. Is there any way a parent or a guardian can help such kids?

“Overconfidence needs to be channelised in a manner that a two-year-old does not have the reality testing that they might be crossing a line. But a 10-year-old can recognise where they might have to hold back, where they need to be vocal about their opinion,” Dr Era explains.

Ishit Bhatt’s conduct on KBC: Was it his natural response or poor parenting?

When the episode aired, the internet judged Ishit harshly for his impulsive behaviour and questioned how he was brought up. But is that fair? Dr Era urges us to focus on several factors before drawing a conclusion. “For some kids, it is a natural response to get excited when they’re in the public eye. They want to show the entire range of their personality. But others get shy and nervous,” Dr Era explains.

Does this overshadow the role of parenting in a child’s life? Such overconfident kids might have parents who never encouraged their child to be mindful of others’ boundaries. The neuropsychiatrist also mentions the Six-Pocket syndrome or the Single-Child syndrome. In this concept, there is a sense of entitlement and a constant showering of praise. This makes the child believe that what they say is golden and that they need to be given priority in any situation.

Simultaneously, Dr Era talks about the current social environment that promotes speaking one’s mind out loud. She also raises concerns about mental health issues underlying such impulsive behaviour in kids. “In certain disorders, we find impulsivity as a trait where the person cannot let the other person finish their sentence. Sometimes, they don’t even listen properly, and blurt out whatever comes to their mind without censoring,” Dr Era explains. She also emphasises that poor social skills, especially among people who are neurodivergent and on the spectrum, might cause such behaviour.

From assertiveness to entitlement

Let’s be honest: interacting with outspoken kids is fun until they get “too much”. But how can you know if a child’s assertiveness has shifted to a sense of entitlement? Dr Era suggests observing such behaviour in several settings. Are such kids outspoken only at home, or also at their school, in a playground, and with random strangers? If yes, you should consider how to deal with it. Here are some signs Dr Era suggests looking out for.

• The child has difficulty accepting that they are wrong.
• They have difficulty understanding other people’s perspectives.
• They are insistent on cutting off ties with anybody who disagrees with them.
• The child believes that if their things are being used for play, everyone must follow their rules only.

“Some of these signs are age-appropriate. But parents should be mindful to keep their children slightly more humble and grounded if they want them to thrive as adults,” Dr Era says. According to her, entitlement can lead to several social, professional, occupational, and interpersonal issues, especially in a world where we are constantly thinking only about ourselves.

How parents and teachers can guide outspoken kids

“Learning to listen and understand is a core skill our generation needs to develop. And our next generations must start imbibing it too, so we are not just repeating the truth we find online,” Dr Era says. She also suggests that parents and teachers help kids learn to be empathetic humans. The children must learn to allow other people to have their opinion and not constantly counter, criticise, or cut them short.

Role modelling is one of the best ways to teach children about empathy. “Parents and teachers should show kids how to listen rather than just to speak. This will help children grasp the concept better, and imbibe as well,” Dr Era suggests.

Exposing children to social media and national TV shows

Today, we see so many kids making reels on Instagram that we even use their funny dialogues as references in our everyday life. Then there are kids like Ishit Bhatt and Arunodai Sharma, who appear on national platforms like KBC. But is such exposure good for children? Dr Era considers kids being on a national platform both a boon and a bane. “It gives them the exposure, confidence, a platform to showcase their talents, and ultimately brag about the limelight among their peers,” she says. But you can’t ignore the public scrutiny that follows, right? “More than this, such exposure can make children extremely dependent on external validation,” Dr Era says.

In the case of Ishit Bhatt getting trolled online for his conduct on KBC, it can affect the child’s psyche. “In some cases, this can cause Post Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD). The child might face bullying, especially if they said something publicly that didn’t land well with the audience,” Dr Era explains. The neuropsychiatrist also mentions that recent psychological studies reveal that children exposed to social media are more prone to developing mental health issues. Whether they’re consuming the content or making it, they can develop social anxiety, depression, sleep issues, and other health problems.

So, if you’re a parent, teacher, or guardian reading this, you must monitor what your child is consuming online. You must also try to engage them in other activities to limit their social media consumption.

If you want to connect with consultant neuropsychiatrist Dr Era Dutta for more personalised mental health advice, you can find her here.

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