‘Tis the season of bold promises and even bolder failures. While most of us resolve to hit the gym or drink more water, Bollywood stars take it up a notch (because drama, darling). So, we thought, why not imagine how our beloved Bollywood’s New Year preps are going and what our favourite B-town celebs would probably have on their New Year’s resolution list? Spoiler alert: It’s so ambitious that they’d make Karan Johar’s film budgets blush.

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‘To not look THIS cute all the time’

Vicky Kaushal is every mum’s dream son-in-law. This year, he should promise to tone down the charm, just so the rest of us can have a fighting chance at love. Whether he can actually do it is debatable because we’ve seen what that pretty face can do.

‘To teach my co-stars to dance better’

Between her smooth moves and her immaculate coordination, Katrina Kaif has carried more item numbers than anyone else in B-town. 2025 might just be the year she starts hosting dance boot camps, because let’s be honest, her co-stars sometimes dance like they are trying to dodge traffic.

‘To sign only 25 films this year’

Khiladi Kumar’s packed schedule is what happens when a man is allergic to free time. For 2025, Akshay should vow to slow down by taking on fewer roles. But we know by fewer, he means only one film every two weeks. Baby steps, right?

‘To rhyme slightly less during interviews’

Sara Ali Khan’s interviews are delightful, but her penchant for rhyming everything makes us feel like we’re at a kindergarten talent show. This year, Sara, try to express yourself in complete, non-rhyming sentences. But knowing Sara, we’ll still get, “New year, new me, wait and see!”

‘To chill. Okay, maybe just a little’

Kangana Ranaut should decide to spend less time on Twitter and more time… actually, who are we kidding? She’ll probably use 2025 to challenge even more people to metaphorical duels and continue declaring herself the reigning queen of everything.

‘To convince the world that I am not a Greek God… just a demigod’

Hrithik’s resolution should be to tone down the mythological perfection. Maybe post a photo with a double chin or a slightly uneven eyebrow. But even his “I just woke up” look could make Zeus file for early retirement.

‘To stop making people fall in love with me by accident’

SRK’s charm is a public hazard at this point. This year, he should hide those dimples. No winks, no smirks, and definitely no stretching his arms out at train stations. It’s about time we were given a chance to focus on real life.

‘To stop being breathtakingly beautiful… for at least an hour a day’

Bebo’s resolution is ambitious: to give the rest of us mortals a break by being just regular for 60 minutes every day. But knowing her, this might only happen if the lights go out and there’s a blackout filter on Instagram.

‘To stop dating people who don’t pick up my call even after I ring them 75 times’

It’s time that Ananya Panday takes a resolution to not date unworthy people. This year, she’s demanding basic decency – pick up the phone or you’re out. Respect, Ananya.

‘To not give meme-worthy expressions… even if it kills me’

Alia Bhatt’s face has become the internet’s favourite playground, so this year is the year to keep things neutral. Of course, she’s still making a meme-able pout somewhere. Stay strong, Alia, we believe in you (and your overworked facial muscles).

‘To never let my films make sense… ever’

From flying cars to villains with questionable physics-defying logic, Bhai has made a career out of keeping our brains firmly switched off. 2025 will be no different. I hope this year Sallu Bhai works on a script where he single-handedly defeats aliens using only a tube of toothpaste and a shirt he refuses to wear.

Our Bollywood celebs are stepping into 2025 with resolutions that are as extra as their personalities and we wouldn’t have it any other way.

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